Now I am Enough Old for Remembering the Past
Recently I read Susan Sontag's WHERE THE STRESS FALLS, 2001. The impression is a little different with the other books.
I was never the good reader of her, but her existence was always strong and had glittered.
The time was Sixties that contained the infinite things in it.
Now I am enough old for remembering the time.
She wrote a fine essay on the time, Thirty Years Later ... , 1996. The pages are short but sufficient to describe the time that was infinite and endless.
If her life was able to be shine, while my Sixties was always under the tiny dim light.
At the place where I was, the long view never could be seen. I never thought on the things as I was very coward and was fluttered even at the very tiny event of the time. I was infirm and timidity.
What I could do at that time was read or turned pages of the text books of some foreign languages.
How little and shallow heart I had, pitiable and poor existence. Probably till now.
Reference
Under the Dim Light
Tokyo
27 September 2012
Sekinan Research Field of Language
To my dear friend KANEKO Yutaka
We were always sitting at the right end of the classroom, where the seats were near the entrance from the corridor, so classmates entered the room with rattling noises. But we liked the seats rather satisfying. We were G class of the third year of high school, which class was all hoped to go universities of the mathematical or science fields.The seats were free to sit but almost determined by the personalities. The serious were sitting at the comparatively before widows sites. The seats were quiet and easy to concentrate. We were also serious to the learning but liked probably the worst seats that could not concentrate by the various noises for entering and out-going to the room. But we loved the seats.
Sometimes over our heads vain calculate-papers were being thrown to the can behind us. KANEKO Yutaka and I first met at this class and became best friend. He probably hoped to go to chemistry and I was physics. He was very good at mathematics and I was ordinary at math. I sometimes asked him how to solve the hard quests of math. At that time he smiled to me and said, ” there’s any little paper? The problem can be written enough by such a little space.”
Over the our seats, papers were frequently flown to the end of the class where the trash can was set always fulled with the calculate-papers for math and writing of English memos. The members of the class were all eager to solve math quests for preparing to entrance examinations to the universities. At the result they threw the used papers over us towards the can. So around the can, the scraps were littered with. I was never tidy but I was the nearest one to the can, so I sometimes went to trash dump to clean the can.
After we graduated the high school, he studied chemistry as planned at university. But I selected language study, not physics. I also liked philosophical or linguistic fields for their long historical heritages. What I returned to the field related with physics was already over the age 30s. As a result my research object has been narrowed to language universals using mathematical writing or physical approach.
After half a century, he died by disease in his researching way' while I have learnt same theme on language using maths way not solving any quest from 1920s’ Linguistic Circle of Prague. Over my head still now vain calculate-papers are being thrown to the can behind us. If I ask him to help me for solving, he will say to me wanting tiny paper to write the simple answer with his dear smiling as ever.
Tokyo
22 May 2013
Sekinan Research Field of Language
13 February 2015 Revised